


Please

by StarlightDragon



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 10x22 The Prisoner, 10x22 coda, Angst, Canon Compliant, Canon Expansion, Castiel's POV, M/M, Major Spoilers, Season/Series 10, reverse crypt scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-14
Updated: 2015-05-14
Packaged: 2018-03-30 13:31:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3938596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarlightDragon/pseuds/StarlightDragon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel wasn't fighting back while Dean was attacking him in the bunker. This is what he was thinking, but couldn't quite say.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Please

**Author's Note:**

> So I actually planned on writing something like this before last night's episode aired, and now I just couldn't resist. I was sitting there with my fingers crossed just wishing that Cas would say 'I love you' or something of the sort, because he was blatantly thinking it, so this is my perspective on everything that was going through his head while Dean was being controlled by the Mark.
> 
> Theoretically, I suppose this could be read as platonic, but realistically you probably wouldn't be reading this if you didn't believe that Cas and Dean are in love.

_Dean._

_I know that right now, you can’t see that there’s any difference between the Mark's actions and your own. You see the Mark as a part of you, because you think that deep down, you’ve always been this way, and you've always had the potential to do this. But I saw the way your soul shined so brightly in Hell, saw the way it eclipsed everything else there because of how clearly it stood out. It was pure and it was good and it didn’t belong. I wonder what your soul would look like now. I’m almost glad I don’t have enough Grace to see it._

_I’ve been there. I know what it’s like when there’s something inside of you, something taking control from the inside out, trying to turn you against everything you believe. I know how hard it is to fight it. Ever wonder why I’m so concerned with getting rid of your Mark? It’s not because I don’t want anyone else to die, or because I don’t want to lose you. It’s because I know. I know how it feels to suffer the burden, every day, of having something inescapable; some power that’s taken a hold of you and won’t let go. I know what that does to a person, never being able to escape that. And I know how scared you are right now. Scared that you’ll succumb to it all, but also scared that you won’t. Scared that you’ll have to fight this battle every day for hundreds of years, when you’re already exhausted._

_Think about the number of demons you’ve fought from the outside. Take that, use that, and know that you are the best hunter that's lived and that you are strong enough to fight just this one from the inside._

_How long has it been since I gripped you tight and raised you from perdition? Compared to how long I’ve been on Earth, it’s been no time at all. And yet those few years have changed me more than I can believe. Before I pulled you out of Hell, I observed humanity, I watched you, but always from the sidelines, never getting involved. But in all those millions of years, I never understood humanity the way I do now. I learnt my humanity from you, Dean, and now you’re losing your own, and I don't know how much longer I can handle seeing that._

_If you do this, this is the moment everything changes. Right now, there’s you and there’s the Mark, up against one another in the fighting ring. You cannot let the Mark win. If you let that happen, you will never come back from that. You know what happens next, and I’m not just talking about black eyes._

_You think the Mark is your curse, and that you need to fight it alone, but I’d rather have you, cursed or not._

_You_ do _deserve to be saved, now more than ever._

_I love you, Dean. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wanted to say that to you, and I certainly don't know the first time I wanted to say it. But I know that I can’t imagine anything else. You’re all there is, and I will never walk any path that doesn’t end where you are. So if this is my last breath, then this is what I want to say with it: I love you._

Dean raised the knife, holding Castiel helpless against the floor, and Cas tried to say every one of these things. But in the end, all he was able to force out; choking on his own blood and staring wildly up at Dean was _“Dean, please.”_

And in the end, that was enough.

For now.


End file.
